When Divorce is NOT an Option! by Marriage Works Relationship columnist Ron & Ty Maddox

Divorce. This is a hard revelation for some and a lifestyle others. Whatever side of the fence
you currently reside on, there are three main factors to consider: Prayer, Sacrifice and Commitment.
A prayer life is essential in a marriage because it bridges the gap between your personal desires
and God’s desires for you and your marriage. Without the foundation of prayer in a relationship, there is a strong possibility that you are not living up to God’s potential for your life, which can lead to your marriage suffering as a result. When things seem complicated and are not lining up with the word of God, this could be a clear indication that something is missing. Earlier on in our marriage, a prayer life was not the foundation. Sometimes we even had separate prayer lives. We prayed when things got tough and w hen our backs were against the wall, but praying consistently wasn’t a part of our marriage, to say the least.
The lesson here is that when you don’t learn early to apply prayer in your marriage, you end up experiencing moments that push you into a place of confusion, turmoil, misunderstandings and ultimately feeling like divorce is the only option. Prayer i s useful because it encourages self- control and discipline when there are individual changes that need to take place. Learning to pray for your spouse is an open invitation for God to intervene in your relationship on your behalf. While prayer is only one of the factors to a healthy marriage, it’s just the beginning.
One must also be willing to sacrifice.
Sacrifice is a powerful word. But when it comes to your marriage, it is something that you must
consider on a daily basis. Whether you are sacrificing your time, your way of handling finances,
not always being right, being controlling, fears, emotional baggage, or infidelity,it is inevitable
that sacrifice becomes a necessity. You have to choose to become self less and vulnerable in
knowing that your sacrifice will not be in vain. By making this a daily choice, you will become a
better person for giving it your all versus growing resentment because you couldn’t see past the
option of divorce. Each person must make the personal decision to be all in without expectation, as this will bring true unity. You must be willing to give up your position for the sake of the marriage. By becoming selfless, you begin to truly enjoy your mate and your marriage.
With sacrifice comes commitment.
Commitment is not always just a state of mind that forces you to stay the course. As we said
our vows before God, we promised to stay married for better,for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. This is the true commitment that we stray away from when the aforementioned become issues in the marriage. Instead of choosing to stay the course, we look to divorce as the only option. Commitment is that very part of the relationship that provides security in knowing that you have each other’s back. There is nothing more fulfilling then knowing with all your heart that you have someone in your life that will always be there for you and has provided a safe zone for you to share your inner most thoughts and feelings. There is nothing more rewarding than having someone who will not use those things against you, but instead commit to be there for you through life’s challenges and stressors.
You learn to hang in there for the good and the bad. Your mindset begins to change and you learn that your emotions got you to a place of discontent and resentment. Your eyes begin to open and you begin to see yourself and your significant other in a whole new light. You become open to growth. You embrace the challenging times because you’ve experienced the outcome of growing closer to your mate. You accept that what God has put together, no man or woman can take apart. You ultimately adapt Prayer,Sacrifice, and Commitment to your marriage because Divorce is not an Option!

Relationship Couple Ron & Ty Maddox

Join us next month as we discuss Intimacy in a Marriage!